Thursday, 19 September 2013

Touch and Go by Lisa Gardner

Here is something I learned when I was eleven years old: Pain has a flavor. 

Hooking isn't hard. Opening with a conflict, or an unusual character; a situation that intrigues or with a puzzling statement, like the above. Pain has a flavor. Hmm, does this character suffer from synesthesia? In any case, this line has hooked my attention. A good first line. Too bad about the second one:

The question is, what does it taste like to you?

Now the writer is unhooking me. Oh, why not go ahead and break the fourth wall. She doesn't even bother to be polite and ask: Excuse me, may I ask you a question? I hate it when a writer tries to pull me into their story, especially if the story sucks. And what if the reader does not have that weird condition called synesthesia? Or is this a rhetorical question? Is the writer collecting answers on her website?

Next sentence, new paragraph.

Tonight my pain tasted like oranges.

Kinky. I want to laugh, but I need to go to the washroom. The rest of the page and chapter talk about food, a restaurant, a date and some back story about money and plumbing. Or something like that. I don't care anymore.

First thing said:

"Gonna eat?"

Verdict: Pass (barely - on the weight of that first sentence)

Rudy Globird

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