Night Moves by Randy Wayne White

We were half a mile high in a bright everglades sky, on the trail of five Navy torpedo bombers that vanished in 1945, yet my friend Tomlinson remained fixated on the fate of out marina's cat, which had gone missing only two days earlier.

This sentence is long but at least it has something of interest: setting, high in the sky over Florida; characters; context; and some conflict in a missing cat. The only thing that interests me in this sentence, however, is that they are on the trail of the bombers that vanished in 1945. So I would have preferred the narrative follow this line; instead, it goes on about the missing cat.

First thing said:

"The problem with cats," he lectured..."is they have the ability to block human brain probes whenever they're in the damn mood."

In the end, I think this has enough to pull readers in.

Verdict: Pass (barely)

Sincerely,
Theodore Moracht