So begins a short prologue titled Zero, chapter zero I guess. Because it's such a short sentence perhaps we should add some more. The prologue continues:
He ran as fast as he could. As if Hell itself were chasing him. As if his life depended on it.
So to sum up, in case you aren't sure: He's running really fast. Glance down a couple lines, and not only is he running like the devil but doing it with a knife sticking in him. So he can't be running as fast as the opening lines suggest to the mind and therefore with the contradictory information the mind shuts down and the book actually shuts itself closed..
Chapter 1:
Nate Tucker found out about the apartment as people often learn about the things which change their lives forever - by sheer luck.
This line does not hook, it only promises that there is a hook later on, though when it will come, I don't know; you will have to read on and find out for yourself. We have a character we have no reason to care about and an apartment we have no reason to be curious about, except that it will change the character's life. So we can assume up until this point this character leads a boring life, or the story before meeting the apartment would begin the story.
First thing said:
"That suck's."
Hm.
Verdict: Fail
Sincerely,
Rudy Globird
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