Another great opening line. A situation that is obviously out of the ordinary but also reveals something extraordinary. The bad grammar is a little disconcerting because I I don't much like the realism of dialect in stories. It's distracting and annoying. Reading Huck Finn was enough for me.
Next line and first thing said:
"Need a poo, Todd."
"Shut up, Manchee,"
"Poo. Poo, Todd."
"I said shut it."
This little conversation between a boy and his dog seems so ordinary at first glance, it's amusing. After this attention grabbing opening the story settles into ordinary standard storytelling and my attention starts to wane. Nevertheless, I plod on for another page to find the scene and conflict between the boy and dog hooks me back again.
Verdict: Pass
Sincerely,
Theodore Moracht
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